


used to be one of the rotten ones (and i liked you for that)

by mememan



Category: The Yogscast
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dubious life decisions, Explicit Language, M/M, Teencast
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 13:07:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6957721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mememan/pseuds/mememan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you don't want the past to be the past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	used to be one of the rotten ones (and i liked you for that)

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by the song Anthems For A Seventeen Year Old Girl, as you can guess from the title. but when i say inspired i mean very loosely.

The phone buzzed underneath Sjin’s hand three times before he could bring himself to open his eyes. He turned it on, cursing as the screen shot razor sharp light into his tired eyeballs. Too tired to be angry, he just sighed and checked which asshole was texting him at three in the morning.

There were three messages from Sips. 

Sjin nearly broke a leg as rocketed out of bed. Rubbing at his sore ankle, he glanced out the window to confirm that his Prince Charming was indeed waiting for him in his shiny metal death trap. He texted him back quickly, letting him know he was coming. He got dressed as fast and quiet as his sleep addled body would allow then began working his way out his window. He never truly appreciated his single-story house until he and Sips began sneaking out. 

He tiptoed his way across his lawn–hoping he didn’t look too suspicious–then opened the door with ‘slut’ keyed crudely into it. The vandalism just showed up one day. They both theorized that some drunk fuck was trying to get back at an ex when he mistook Sips’ beat up truck for her presumably just as beat up truck. 

“Come on, Sjin, the slutmobile is on a tight schedule,” Sips said as soon as Sjin got in. Sjin gave an acknowledging hum and buckled his seat belt.

“Yeah, so tight that I didn’t even get to find my deodorant,” Sjin said, a smile tugging at his lips. He was surprised he manged to find clothes off the mess of his floor that weren’t covered in huge disgusting stains.

“Hey, you know I love your natural musk,” Sips said, smile wide. He leaned towards Sjin and inhaled sharply. “Mmm, yup, smells like teen spirit.”

Sjin giggled and lightly pushed Sips back on to his half of the truck. “Just drive already.”

-

They sat in the car in front of the convenience store, slushies in hand and enough snacks to kill a man. Sjin’s music played through his phone as they gorged themselves.

“Christ, Sjin, what’s with the cheese?” Sips asked, a little bit of food coming out as he laughed. He continued when only met with a confused look from Sjin. “Do you got every Broadway number on there as well?”

Sjin laughed. “Hey, if you don’t like it you can get out. Otherwise, you gotta choose between Karma Chameleon and Never Gonna Give You Up.”

“I can’t believe you’re torturing me like this in my own damn car. Wasn’t there a Geneva Convention against this?”

“Yeah, the same one that said if you don’t have any backup music you need to shut the fuck up.” 

Sips snorted out a laugh. “Next time I’ll force you to listen to shitty Canadian garage bands.”

“Don’t bet against me liking something Canadian, Sipsy,” Sjin replied with a smirk.

“Yeah, you canadaboo.”

“Is that the term?”

“It is now.”

Sjin hummed and took another sip from his slushie.

There was a moment of relative silence filled only with mindless pop lyrics coming from Sjin’s phone.

“I got accepted,” Sjin said awkwardly. “To the one that’s really far away.”

“Yeah?” Sips asked. His voice sounded like his throat was getting tighter.

“Yeah.”

“So you’re gonna be dorming?”

“Yeah.” Sjin played with his straw. “But maybe if I sacrifice enough virgins to the college gods I’ll be able to make it back for holidays.”

Sips placed a hand on Sjin’s thigh. He shot him a soft smile. “It’s not all bad. We could still cyber between course work.”

Sjin snorted. “Yeah, there’s always that.”

“…So how long do we have?”

“Long enough,” Sjin said and grabbed Sips’ hand to kiss his knuckles. 

-

It took a year after their separation for Sips to finally call Sjin, officially breaking it off. It wasn’t a surprise, seeing as they never had time for each other with their course work and internships and part-time jobs. It would be better if they both found someone in living in their area, and going in the same direction in life.

Sjin spent that entire night crying, trying to convince himself it was for the better this way. 

-

Sjin shouldn’t have been this nervous. Yes, he was going to dinner with his ex. Yes, that ex was hiring him as the lead architect of a project for his rapidly growing business. But that break-up happened years ago! And people went to dinner with their employer all the time. This was a completely normal event and there was no reason to be getting emotional about it.

Sjin took a deep breath and parked the car at the restaurant they agreed on. Nothing too fancy–or romantic, Sjin reminded himself–but quite expensive now that Sips was a man of money. He checked his make-up to see if any of it smudged and then stepped towards the entrance, taking another deep breath. Sips was just hiring him because he was in need of a good architect. This dinner couldn’t even be considered anywhere near a date–Sips was engaged now, for fuck’s sake.

He was taken to the table where Sips was already waiting for him. It took everything for Sjin to stop himself from biting his lip. Sips looked like a living dream. Everything about him was undeniably handsome: That perfectly tailored suit! And his hair, his stubble, his jaw! Oh, those beautiful dark eyes. His great big nose, his broad shoulders, his plump lips, and his large hands! Sjin had to stop himself there before his mind wandered to the times they shared where Sips put those lips and hands to good use.

“Hello, Mr. Underscore,” Sjin said. He was as stiff as a board; his hands shook with nervousness despite himself.

“Ah, Sjin, come on! You stop talking to a guy for a few years and suddenly you’re on last name basis again?” Sips gave Sjin a lopsided smile before extending his hand. Sjin took it and focused on relaxing. 

“Ha, sorry. This is my first time working for someone I knew from high school. Not sure about the proper etiquette.” 

Sips’ smile flattered a bit and Sjin began panicking. He went over what he said in his head and tried to find the problem.

“Well, take a seat. You ready to order something? Remember, it’s my treat.” 

“Oh, sure!” Sjin glanced over the menu briefly before choosing something cheap that sounded familiar and some wine. He knew he shouldn’t, given that he drove here, but he felt as taunt as a spring about to snap. Surely one glass wouldn’t hurt…

They discussed the project for a while over their dinners. Sjin sipped at his glass frequently, waiting for the alcohol to kick in so he could look at Sips in the face without feeling the need to flee. Soon, their conversation began to fall back into familiar patterns. It was rough to get back into the old rhythm, but when they hit that sweet spot it was as easy as breathing. They talked about things they’ve seen and done, and trash talked the people they knew, both currently and previously. Sjin’s heart sped up every time Sips made a raunchy joke and flashed him a smile. He replied the only way he knew how–with an even raunchier joke–and Sips’ laugh felt like it could cure all of his ails.

Their plates were empty when Sjin went to finish off the wine left in his glass. It wasn’t until he downed it all that he realized it was his fourth helping.

“Oh, fuck.” He lowered his head into his hands. Of all the people to make a drunk ass of himself in front of… Sips checked a lot of the ‘won’t ever live it down’ boxes. “Fuck, I’m such an idiot.”

“Sjin? You okay?” Sips asked. He finished paying for dinner and was putting his jacket back on. 

“I drove here,” Sjin said, his words muffled by his hands. He peaked at Sips through his fingers and found that he couldn’t look at his face without shame running through his entire body like a hot shower.

“Oh, Christ, Sjin.” Sips gave a light laugh and placed a hand on Sjin’s shoulder. “You want me to give you a ride?”

Sjin considered saying no and paying for a ride, but he didn’t like his chances in the back of a stranger’s car while his eyes were so heavy from the wine. He nodded, slowly got up, and followed Sips out to his car. 

The car was shiny, futuristic, and looked like it cost several arms and even more legs. Sjin gave a low whistle as he admired the details.

“Definitely an upgrade from the slutmobile,” Sjin said as he climbed into the passenger’s side. His brain sent off several alarms, all reprimanding him for bringing up the crude joke that permeated their past romantic relationship. He opened his mouth to apologize, but Sips cut him off.

“Any car with you in it is the slutmobile,” Sips said with a laugh as he buckled his seat belt.

Sjin barked out laughing. Sips watched, amused and relieved that his joke didn’t offend.

“You talk this way to all your architects or am I just special?” Sjin asked, his smile wide. He rubbed the starting wetness of tears away from the corner of his eyes.

“Come on, you know you’re special, Sjinny boy,” Sips said with a soft smile as he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the road. Sjin felt heat creep up onto his cheeks at the nickname.

There was a moment of awkward silence between them before Sips gave a shout.

“Oh! Uh, where am I taking you? Because right now we’re headed back to my place.” Sips laughed, blush hot across his cheeks.

“Uh, that apartment complex with the fountain up front. C-something Street?”

“Sjin, what the fuck. Do you not know your own address?”

“Um, Sipsy, I just moved in and I’m about to pass out. I’m surprise I even remember your name.” Sjin slid down as far in his seat as his seat belt would allow.

“You’re not that drunk, stop pretending,” Sips tried to say sternly, but couldn’t help laughing. 

“You don’t know that. I had four glasses of wine! Do I look like someone who can hold their wine?”

“You look like the stick you always were. Just with more facial hair. And better eyeliner.” Sips glanced at Sjin as he said this, blush returning to his cheeks. The compliment made Sjin’s heart race. He remembered the first time he experimented with make-up and how Sips kissed the lipstick right off him. 

Sjin swallowed the lump in his throat. Wine was definitely a bad idea. This called for evasive action.

“So, you’re, um… Your fiancée. Tell me about her.” 

Sips smile faltered and his hands tightened on the wheel. “She’s… nice.”

“Just nice?”

“I’ve only known about the woman for four months, what more do you want?”

“Four months?! And you’re marrying her? Babe, she could be a murderer!” Sjin shot up in his seat. He could already see some black widow character luring in his poor Sipsy before she takes both his life and life insurance. 

Sjin went pale when he realized he just called Sips babe for the first time in years.

“Look, she’s the daughter of a business partner,” Sips continued, pretending not to notice the slip up. “Her dad kept dropping hints, the loneliness got to me, and the rest is history. If you consider a month ago to be history…”

Sjin stayed silent, afraid that if he spoke he’d say something embarrassing again.

“And I didn’t think… I thought you wouldn’t come back,” Sips continued, hands now holding the steering wheel in a death grip. 

“Sorry? I… I don’t know what you mean.”

Sips looked conflicted before saying “Fuck it” and pulling over onto the side of the road and parking.

Sips closed his eyes and breathed deeply then turned to Sjin, looking nervous. Sjin wondered if he fucked everything up… if his lingering feelings and loose lips cost him a job.

“I love you,” Sips said, voice wavering slightly.

“…What?”

“God, Sjin, I love you!” Sips took Sjin’s hand into his. “I thought if I saw you and how much you changed I’d finally be able to kill these feelings. These… these feelings that have been hounding me for years… I hoped that maybe you’d be taken, or somehow turned into a boring loser after college sucked you dry. But you’re even more beautiful and more clever and funnier than ever before and I just wanted to jump that table and kiss you!”

Sips brought Sjin’s hand to his lips and kissed his knuckles.

“Sipsy, you’re engaged!” Sjin said, pulling his hand away.

“To some woman I don’t even know! Just because she was the first one that came along when I decided it was either give up on you or die alone? She’s nice and good-looking and smart but she’s not you!” Sips tore the engagement ring off his finger. The band of silver flew into the backseat as Sjin gasped. 

“Oh, god, Sips, I’m not some homewrecker! You can’t leave your fiancée for me! Please think about this…”

“I am! I have been! For years I’ve just been thinking about how I’ll never be as happy as when we were seventeen and just being useless kids, sitting in the slutmobile at three in the morning!” 

“Sips, this isn’t some romcom! You can’t just run away from your fiancée and be seventeen with me forever!”

“I don’t want to be seventeen forever!” Sips shouted and a dense silence fell over them. He was crying. “I–I want to be thirty and forty and fifty with you! I want to come home to you and just watch shitty T.V. while we cuddle! I want to take you to boring business parties and tell everyone you’re my husband and make out in some empty room while those boring business fucks talk about stocks and eat all smelly cheese!”

Sjin blinked, trying to process what Sips just said. “You want me.”

“Yes!” Tears were now dripping from Sips’ jaw. “I’ve loved you and still love you and will keep loving you! Christ, Sjin, you’re all I ever wanted!”

Sjin could feel tears of his own start to roll down his face. “Oh, Sipsy… I missed you. I missed you so much!” More tears flooded his face when Sips reached out to rub at the tear stains with his thumb. “I love you, Sips!”

Sips pulled Sjin’s face down towards his and kissed him. Sjin threw himself into the kiss and nearly jumped out of his skin when his elbow hit the car horn.

“Shit! Shit, sorry,” Sjin apologized.

“It’s okay,” Sips said under his breath and pulled Sjin back into the kiss. It was desperate and needy and open-mouthed. Sjin pulled away just as Sips tried to slip his tongue past his lips.

“Can we wait for this until I’m not drunk and sleepy?” 

“Shit, right!” Sips said and laughed nervously. “Lets just take you back to my place so you can sleep this off.”

“But what about your fiancée?”

“We don’t live together. She was supposed to move in, but said something about her roommate still needing her. If she wasn’t engaged to me, I’d say they had something going on.”

“Is that why Daddy Fiancée was so eager to set her up?”

Sips laughed. “Probably. Gotta say, it’s gonna be ridiculously easy to break this thing off.”

Sjin hummed in agreement. 

They drove in relative silence. The radio played on some rock station and Sjin kept jokingly requesting that they listen to Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up. 

When they got to Sips’ house, Sjin almost collapsed onto the living room carpet. Sips grabbed him and lead him to the bedroom, laughing and cursing that he was much heavier than he looked. 

Sjin was out like a light before Sips even told him goodnight. He tiptoed out of the room to go sleep on the couch, looking back before he shut the door and sighed happily.

-

Sjin woke up and immediately panicked when he didn’t recognize where he was. The panic subsided when the memories of last night came flooding back, accompanied with a dull headache. He looked at the digital clock on the drawer beside the bed. Six in the morning.

He slid out of the bed and quietly made his way into the hall. He glanced at the unfamiliar doors before deciding to follow the snores coming from the living room.

Sips was sleeping on the couch in a position that could not have been good for his back. Sjin nudged him gently and called his name until Sips managed to pry one eye open with a grunt.

“Sipsy, where’s the bathroom?”

“Third door… Left…” Sips said, voice groggy. Sjin whispered a thank you as he placed a kiss onto Sips’ forehead. 

He made his way back down the hallway and began his morning routine. He decided to use his finger to scrub last nights dinner off his teeth and came to the conclusion that Sips wouldn’t miss a small dot of toothpaste. He kept his smudged make-up on, however. Sjin wasn’t too keen on leaving his face all over Sips’ hand towels.

When he made his way back to the living room, Sips was sitting on the couch. He rubbed at his eyes and didn’t notice Sjin until he was right next to him.

“Hey,” he said with a sleepy smile.

“Hey,” Sjin returned. “I’m thinking of making breakfast. Can I borrow your kitchen?”

Sips chuckled. “Sure, if you can find anything to make breakfast with. Here, let me show you where it is.”

Sips’ kitchen seemed to have plenty of gadgets, and excitement bubbled in Sjin as he thought of using them. Yet when Sjin peeked into the fridge and cabinets he found almost no actual ingredients amongst the pre-made, ready-to-eat foods.

He decided to just make some classic buttered toast while he waited for Sips to return from the bathroom. 

Sjin was in the middle of pondering why no one invented a see-through toaster yet when he felt hands on his hips.

“And what unheard of delicacy are you making me?” Sips asked and snaked his arms around Sjin’s waist. 

“Oh, you’ve never had something like this before. Only people with the most daring of appetites would dare to even go near this shit.”

“Yeah? Can’t wait to give it a taste,” Sips said. Sjin could feel his smile against his shoulder.

There was a moment of stillness and silence where the only sound came from the toaster.

“I missed you so much…” Sjin said, tears prickling the corners of his eyes.

“I know… I know. But we can make up for lost time after I try a bite of your dangerous buttered toast,” Sips said and turned Sjin around so they were facing each other.

They stood there, whispering sweet nothings and proclamations of love in-between kisses, until the stench of burnt toast brought them back to reality.


End file.
